Have you ever experienced love for your job but not for your co-workers? It's funny because sometimes it's your co-workers who make you love your job. And, other times you may love your work but your feelings may not be as strong for the people you work with. Surely we all experience conflict, tension and frustration with our co-workers from time-to-time. But what about the times when you know there are real personality conflicts. Even worse, what do you do when you are constantly bumping heads with a co-worker or one person rubs your the wrong way all of the time.
I wish I had a magical answer for you that could make all of your co-worker blues go away. However, co-worker conflict, regardless of how small, is a reality of all work places. I think it's more important to learn how to manage these situations than run from them or cut off relationships. Foremost, co-worker relationships must be handled with gentleness because your actions and what people say about you catch up to you and speak volumes for your people skills and professionalism.
I have worked at several companies since high school and I haven't always been able to avoid conflict or tension with my co-workers. Sometimes conflict is unavoidable. Instead of trying to avoid conflict or pretending it doesn't exist I acknowledge my feelings about co-workers and follow four key strategies. First, I keep lines of communication open. If you can not communicate with someone, you can not work with them either. If work doesn't get done, someone is going to be held responsible. Second, I remain personable and open to small-talk. Everyone is not going to be your best friend, but looking at everyone as your enemy is not helpful either. If people can't say they like you, at least they can say you are a decent and personable human being who says hello in the morning and bless you when someone sneezes. Third, I look for opportunities to mend broken relationships and clear up misunderstandings. Life is all about relationships and that includes the workplace. Extending forgiveness and trying to establish functional relationships will add to the quality of your work experience and others. Last but not least, I don't return and eye for an eye. Sometimes in order to stop a vicious cycle of tension you have to break it by extending grace and not returning rudeness or backstabbing. Just because someone else chooses to be immature, petty or is driven by their insecurities doesn't mean you have to respond in the same manner.
